The Best Friendships Are Like Matryoshka Dolls

“The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sometimes, life hands us the most amazing gifts. And occasionally, if you’re truly blessed they’re like Matryoshka dolls, only in reverse.

A Matryoshka doll holds the sweet surprise of having another one inside, and another inside that one, and so on, each one smaller than the previous one, of course. It’s like getting several gifts in one.

However, when it comes to the gift of a good friend, the sweet surprise is that the friendship expands, the feelings and connection deepen, and unexpected treasures are revealed over time.

Therefore, it’s as though the friendship begins as the smallest Matryoshka doll, and as weeks, months, and years pass, the friendship grows, as does each doll you add. Beautiful gifts of special moments, words of encouragement, sharing celebrations, and many kindnesses are layered one on top of another.

With every precious gift of friendship shared, you add another doll. Each one contains all the previous gifts within it, keeping them safe and always within reach for you to take out and enjoy again and again.

This is how I view a few of my most special friendships and one of those is the one I share with Sandy Peckinpah. Several years ago, I spotted one of her tweets. I couldn’t tell you what it said, butI remember the warmth, sincerity, and kindness in her inspiring words. Her lovely energy leapt off the screen and I had to connect.

At that moment, I could not have foreseen the beautiful friendship that has evolved since then. Nor could I have known how exceptionally intriguing and inspiring her story was.

As she says in her book, How To Survive the Loss of a Child: A Parent’s Step-by-Step Guide to Healing After the Loss of a Child:

“I remember the bliss of walking the Red Carpet at the Emmys when my husband was nominated as writer/producer for a show called Beauty and the Beast. The CBS television series as a modern-day fairy tale starring Linda Hamilton as the Beauty, and Ron Perlman as the Beast.
“I thought of the years [my husband] David and I envisioned the possibility of this very day. The night was so alive, radiating excitement, expectation, glamour, and beauty. It represented an achievement, indeed, but enchanting nights like these often veil the common thread of human experience. It’s hard to imagine sometimes, but these are real people with real lives, sometimes filled with joy, and sometimes great tragedy.”

She also writes:

“I was caught up in the magic of fairy tales, believing that love conquers all, and everything I ever dreamed of could come true.
“No one could have told me on that magical night, our family would soon be ripped apart by the worst that could happen.
“Just five years later, our 16-year-old son, Garrett, woke up with a fever and was dead the next morning. My beautiful, healthy, vibrant boy went from life to death in less than 24 hours by a lethal killer, bacterial meningitis.
“It was on that tragic day, our castle walls tumbled to the ground.”

Her healing journey from this terrible tragedy has led her to help others with theirs through her beautiful book, mentioned above. She is also a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist®. Who better to journey with you through that kind of pain, than someone who has been through it, too?

In spite of her own considerable challenges, Sandy retains a childlike innocence and sweetness that is beyond endearing. In conversations with her, it’s easy to see her purity of heart and how genuine she is. She is wise and insightful, compassionate and kind. An exceptional businesswoman and a loving and devoted wife, mother, daughter, and friend, she is the perfect embodiment of balance between head and heart.

This lovely woman has lived the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. She has worked hard to overcome numerous obstacles and she appreciates every opportunity to help others in their healing journeys.

Gifted Author and Inspiring Writer

Sandy is a talented writer and assisted her late husband, David Peckinpah, in writing every single script he wrote for film and television. A multi-award-winning author, she has several books to her credit as well as countless articles on numerous platforms. And in 2016, she began writing here on Medium.

Quickly, her following grew and the “big pubs” were eager to have her write for them. The Good Men Project asked her to send them everything she wrote, although she shares her beautiful words with other pubs, too. Her articles are impeccable and always curated. When you take a look, you’ll see why.

She adores assisting emerging writers in getting started.

Not only does Sandy use her own story to offer hope, inspiration, and healing for those who need it, she loves helping women tell their stories, too. With her considerable experience in assisting with professional storytelling for film and television, they couldn’t be in better hands.

I wish I had listened to her in 2016 when she told me I should be writing on Medium. But at that time, I had a couple of newspaper and magazine columns, was writing for Huffington Post, had my own blog, books, etc., and did not need yet another place to write.

I had no idea that Medium is so much more than that.

To cut a long story short, eventually I listened to her. I was ready to take the plunge — although I was planning to write fiction here, another of my great loves.

Now, anyone who has been here a while knows that Medium is not your average blogging platform. There is a steep learning curve and when finally, I took Sandy’s advice and was ready to join, I was at a low point due to significant personal trauma. I was feeling overwhelmed with life in general and a steep learning curve did not sound remotely appealing.

Another Matryoshka Doll

After several years of our friendship with Matryoshka dolls layering one on top of another, Sandy offered one particular gift for which I can never thank her enough.

She gave me the gift of her brilliant course on how to get started and be successful on Medium. The easy-to-follow instructional videos plus helpful (and pretty!) accompanying worksheets made it simple for me to dive in and get started right away. It covered everything I needed to know and I will be eternally grateful for all the fabulous information it contained.

Four months later, I’ve published nearly 200 articles, have two growing pubs with an incredibly wonderful and engaged community of inspiring writers, I’m consistently breaking the $100/month milestone, and almost everything I write is being curated.

I’ve even found a way for “Witchy” and me to work together! I’ve been trying to figure it out for a couple of years since I started with her on Facebook. She has a growing fan base on Medium and I’m excited about all our plans for her to make a difference in the world. (Watch this space, as they say!)

Sandy handed me my life on a platter.

Within a few weeks of starting on Medium, I felt like myself again. Unless you know what I’ve been through over the last several years, you can’t begin to imagine what that means to me.

All I’ve ever really wanted to do is write. Thanks to Sandy, I spend my days reading, writing, and connecting with a group of inspiring, wonderful souls who share my passion for words.

I’ve got a community that I needed more than words can say. I’ve made some good friends — some of them have even become off-Medium friends — and I couldn’t be happier.

With all of my heart, Sandy, I thank you for the most amazing Matryoshka friendship. Your ongoing support and kindness over the years, plus this incredible gift of your Medium course and what it has done for me, are among my most valuable treasures.

Here is a recent article of Sandy’s that moved me to tears in the very best ways possible.

Spiritual Arts Mentor and Master Teacher, Liberty Forrest, guides you in discovering who you are, why you’re here, and how to follow that path.