The Wisdom of Pausing: Why Slowing Down Can Change Everything (Copy)
Image by Mircea Iancu from Pixabay
Life has a way of whispering lessons to us. If we do not listen, it starts nudging. And if we still do not listen, it throws us headfirst into chaos until we finally pay attention. My dear friend Emma knows this all too well.
Emma was the most impulsive person I had ever met. She was the type who would sign up for a six-month course on aromatherapy because she had enjoyed one scented candle. She once quit her job because a stranger on a bus convinced her that she should “follow her passion,” except she was not quite sure what her passion was.
Her love life? A rollercoaster. If she met someone she liked, she was planning their future within a week. Her motto? If it feels right, do it! The problem was, what “felt right” on Tuesday often did not feel so right by Friday.
For years, Emma rode this wave of intensity. Sometimes, it worked out. Most of the time, it did not. And eventually, the chaos caught up with her.
The Crash
It all unravelled spectacularly.
A whirlwind romance led to moving in with someone she barely knew. A few weeks in, she realized he was not who she thought, but she had already left her apartment behind. She had also quit another job—this time, on impulse after an argument with her boss.
With no steady income, no stable relationship, and no idea what came next, Emma hit rock bottom. She sat on my couch, eyes puffy from days of crying, and said, "I do not know who I am anymore."
The truth was, she had been making decisions based on emotion alone, mistaking excitement for certainty. She had jumped in headfirst so many times that she had never learned to pause, to breathe, to think before leaping.
And now, she had no choice but to stop.
The Power of Pausing
Pausing feels counterintuitive in a world that glorifies speed. We are told to hustle, decide quickly, act now. But there is immense wisdom in stopping for a moment before reacting, before deciding, before jumping into the next thing just because it feels urgent.
For Emma, learning to pause changed everything.
She did not rush into a new job just to escape the discomfort of unemployment. She sat with it, reflected, and found a position that actually suited her skills and long-term goals.
She did not dive into another relationship the moment she felt lonely. She gave herself time to heal, to understand her patterns, to make decisions from a place of clarity rather than desperation.
She discovered that a pause is not inaction—it is power. It is the space where emotions settle, and reason finds its voice.
How to Cultivate the Wisdom of Pausing
If you are someone who tends to act first and think later, here are a few ways to embrace the power of the pause:
1. Notice the Urge to React
The next time you feel an intense pull to make a decision right now, stop. Ask yourself: Is this urgency real, or is it just my emotions demanding immediate action?
2. Give It Time
If the decision is not life-threatening, it does not need to be made immediately. Whether it is a job offer, a major purchase, or a big life change, give yourself 24 hours—longer if possible. Time creates perspective.
3. Separate Emotion from Action
Emotions provide important signals, but they should not be the sole driver of decisions. Instead of acting because of emotion, acknowledge how you feel and then bring in reason. Ask yourself: What would my calm, clear-headed self decide?
4. Breathe and Ground Yourself
Pausing is not just about delaying action—it is about grounding yourself in the present. Take deep breaths. Go for a walk. Meditate. Anything that brings you back to a calm, centred state before deciding.
5. Ask, “Will This Still Feel Right in a Month?”
What feels exhilarating today might feel reckless in hindsight. Before making a big decision, imagine yourself a month from now. Do you still feel good about it? Or do you sense regret creeping in?
Slowing Down to Move Forward
Emma is still Emma—full of passion, excitement, and big dreams. But now, she gives herself the gift of time. She pauses before she leaps. She lets the dust settle before making choices. And because of that, her life is more stable, more intentional, and infinitely more fulfilling.
If you are someone who tends to rush headlong into decisions, take it from Emma—sometimes, the best thing you can do is pause. Not forever. Not in fear. But just long enough to make sure that when you do move forward, you are moving in the right direction.