The Stories We Tell Ourselves: Shape Your Reality
Have you ever stopped to listen to the stories you tell yourself? Not the ones you share with others, but the quiet, persistent narratives running through your mind—the ones that shape how you see yourself and the world around you?
From the moment we wake up, there’s a constant stream of thoughts guiding our choices, our emotions, and even our sense of possibility. And here’s the thing: those stories are powerful. They can either build us up or hold us back, depending on how we choose to frame them.
I have a dear friend, Amanda, who spent years believing she wasn’t cut out for leadership. She’d tell herself she was too quiet, not assertive enough, and that her ideas weren’t as strong as other people’s. It became such an ingrained belief that she never put herself forward for promotions, never spoke up in meetings, and never considered the possibility that she could be a leader in her own way.
But here’s where things get interesting. One day, Amanda was talking to a mentor who challenged her to examine that story. “Who told you you’re not a leader?” the mentor asked. Amanda hesitated. No one had ever explicitly said those words. It was just something she had come to believe.
That moment changed everything. Amanda started paying attention to how she spoke to herself. Instead of saying, I’m not leadership material, she began to tell herself, I have valuable insights, and people respect my ideas. It felt awkward at first—like trying on a new pair of shoes that didn’t quite fit. But the more she repeated this new story, the more natural it became.
And something remarkable happened. She started acting in ways that aligned with her new belief. She spoke up in meetings. She offered solutions. She volunteered to take the lead on projects. Before long, others began seeing her as a leader—because she had finally started seeing herself that way.
It’s incredible how much our inner dialogue shapes our lives. When we tell ourselves a story of self-doubt, we subconsciously make choices that reinforce that belief. But when we shift the narrative—when we start telling a story of confidence, resilience, and growth—we open the door to new possibilities.
And the best part? We can rewrite our stories at any time.
Of course, this doesn’t mean pretending that past experiences didn’t happen. It simply means looking at them differently. Maybe you grew up believing you weren’t creative because a teacher once criticized your artwork. Or maybe someone made an offhand remark years ago that left you feeling like you weren’t good at math, and you carried that belief into adulthood. These stories aren’t facts. They’re interpretations—and interpretations can change.
One of the most powerful ways to shift your inner story is to pay attention to your words. Notice when you say things like I can’t, I’m not good at that, or I’ll never be able to. Those phrases are red flags, signals that you’re reinforcing a limiting belief. Instead, try swapping them for something more empowering: I’m learning, I’m improving, I’m figuring it out.
Another powerful tool? Visualization. When you take a moment to imagine yourself succeeding—to truly see yourself stepping into the life you want—you’re creating a new script for your mind. Your subconscious doesn’t know the difference between reality and imagination, so when you repeatedly visualise yourself thriving, it starts to feel natural. And when something feels natural, you’re more likely to act on it.
Surrounding yourself with positive influences also helps. The books you read, the podcasts you listen to, the people you spend time with—these all contribute to the stories you absorb. When you surround yourself with uplifting, inspiring messages, they start to shape the way you think.
At the end of the day, the stories we tell ourselves become the reality we live. And the most beautiful thing about that? We get to decide what kind of story we want to tell.
So, what’s a story you’ve been telling yourself that no longer serves you? What if, just for today, you rewrote it into something empowering? Something that lifts you up instead of holding you back?
Because the story you tell yourself today doesn’t have to be the same one you tell tomorrow. And when you choose a new story—one filled with possibility, courage, and belief in yourself—you might just find that your entire world begins to shift.
Everything is energy…those words, those beliefs, those thoughts…they are creating your reality. You can change them—and your future—one thought at a time.
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